Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Archive for the ‘Body acceptance’ Category

Yoni Freedhoff doesn’t believe in the idea of an “ideal” weight and suggests instead your “best” weight:

Let me say it quite plainly (and forgive me for my language) – as a means to set personal goals BMI is bullshit. Sure it may be useful when considering a population and risks associated with weight overall, but it’s simply not useful to you as an individual as there are all sorts of weight-affecting realities that you simply won’t be able (or willing sometimes) to change.

Like every other area of your life, your goal with weight management or healthy living is to do your best, and whatever weight you reach living the healthiest life you honestly and actually enjoy – well that’s your “best weight.”

Here’s more:

Read Full Post »

Blogger and activist Candice Russell writes frankly about life, major weight loss, excess skin in the Truth About ‘Before and After’ Weight Loss Photos:

Life as an “after” is not perfect. You won’t suddenly get the guy, the promotion, or the popularity you’ve always wanted just because you are thin. If you are looking for a fairytale ending, you won’t find it no matter how much weight you lose. And if you focus only on the aesthetics, your journey won’t ever really be complete. …

You are the same person you were, just with slightly different packaging. And unless you learn to love the person that you see in the “before,” nobody will ever accept you as an “after”. Not even you.

Read Full Post »

Gloria Steinem and Dorothy Pitman Hughes (Gabourey Sidibe’s aunt)

Gloria Steinem and Dorothy Pitman Hughes (Gabourey Sidibe’s aunt)

Last week the Ms. Foundation for Women held an 80th birthday bash for Gloria Steinem at its annual gala, the Gloria Awards. One of the guest speakers was actress Gabourey Sidibe, who gave a very inspirational speech about her weight, confidence, and being an asshole:

One of the first things people usually ask me is, “Gabourey, how are you so confident?” I hate that. I always wonder if that’s the first thing they ask Rihanna when they meet her. “RiRi! How are you so confident?” Nope. No. No. But me? They ask me with that same incredulous disbelief every single time. “You seem so confident! How is that?” …

What I would say, is my mom moved my brother and I to my aunt’s house. Her name is Dorothy Pitman Hughes, she is a feminist, an activist, and a lifelong friend of Gloria Steinem. Every day, I had to get up and go to school where everyone made fun of me, and I had to go home to where everyone made fun of me. Every day was hard to get going, no matter which direction I went. And on my way out of the house, I found strength. In the morning on the way out to the world, I passed by a portrait of my aunt and Gloria together. Side by side they stood, one with long beautiful hair and one with the most beautiful, round, Afro hair I had ever seen, both with their fists held high in the air. Powerful. Confident. And every day as I would leave the house… I would give that photo a fist right back. And I’d march off into battle. …

“How are you so confident?” “I’m an asshole!” Okay? It’s my good time, and my good life, despite what you think of me. I live my life, because I dare. I dare to show up when everyone else might hide their faces and hide their bodies in shame. I show up because I’m an asshole, and I want to have a good time. And my mother and my father love me. … So when you ask me how I’m so confident, I know what you’re really asking me: how could someone like me be confident? Go ask Rihanna, asshole!

Please go read the whole speech. Please.

Read Full Post »

I recently came across Marge Piercy’s 1997 poem What Are Big Girls Made Of? The whole poem is well worth the read, but I found the conclusion particularly compelling:

If only we could like each other raw.
If only we could love ourselves
like healthy babies burbling in our arms.
If only we were not programmed and reprogrammed
to need what is sold us.
Why should we want to live inside ads?
Why should we want to scourge our softness
to straight lines like a Mondrian painting?
Why should we punish each other with scorn
as if to have a large ass
were worse than being greedy or mean?

When will women not be compelled
to view their bodies as science projects,
gardens to be weeded,
dogs to be trained?
When will a woman cease
to be made of pain?

Read Full Post »

compassion-hug-yourself-fuzzy-bear-4

Paleo for Women’s Stefani Ruper makes a good case that love is the new skinny:

“Strong is the new skinny,” is what everyone says these days. No longer do you have to look like a runway model! No longer do you have to starve yourself! Wow! Everyone is ecstatic.

Except not everyone is. Who isn’t? I am not. That’s because I know that “strong” means you still have to starve yourself (or at least be restrictive). And build eight pack abs on top of that. “Strong” sets an even higher standard that’s even harder to achieve. It’s unrealistic. It calls for amount of willpower. It demands an egregious amount of your time. …

If we are going to change our standards of beauty away from “skinny,” we may as well do it right and go all the way. … Maybe it’s about a future in which the best, most admired, and most desired people are those with the biggest hearts.

Stefani is looking for “a steady stream of ‘love is the new skinny’ memes.” So head over to her post if you’d like to contribute.

Read Full Post »

Many moons ago, I blogged author/pastor Steven Furtick’s perception vs reality quote about insecurity:

One reason we struggle w/ insecurity: we’re comparing our behind the scenes to everyone else’s highlight reel.

I was reminded of this when I came across this pic/post by Michelle Yeager on my Facebook feed recently:

1969345_665386760187951_1639124567_n

Yeager’s “behind the scenes” might surprise you:

I feel like if everyone, myself included back when I was this lean, actually shared how we are really feeling deep down instead of just positing [sic] a picture of a body and saying “eat clean, train hard” or something along those lines, people would be a lot better off. … But no one wants to talk about how miserable they might be feeling. I know for me I was trying to put on a happy positive face, but on the inside I was a mess. I had sooo much anxiety around food. Everything I put into my body had to be perfectly measured to the gram and calculated for the day. I couldn’t focus on much other than the next time I got to eat, my workout for the day, and taking selfies.

(more…)

Read Full Post »

If you are a woman, if you're a person of colour, if you are gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, if you are a person of size, if you are a person od intelligence, if you are a person of integrity, then you are considered a minority in this world. ...And it's going to be really hard to find messages of self-love and support anywhere. It's all about how you have to look a certain way or else you're worthless. For us to have self-esteem is truly an act of revolution and our revolution is long overdue.

Saw this on a friend’s Facebook feed this AM and the last part about self-esteem being an act of revolution resonated. I Google’d and it turns out there’s more to the quote. Here’s another snippet I liked:

You know when you look in the mirror and you think ‘oh, I’m so fat, I’m so old, I’m so ugly’, don’t you know, that’s not your authentic self? But that is billions upon billions of dollars of advertising, magazines, movies, billboards, all geared to make you feel shitty about yourself so that you will take your hard earned money and spend it at the mall on some turn-around creme that doesn’t turn around shit.

But while the short quote in graphic form works great in a Facebook feed, another part left out highlights what Cho really meant about self-esteem in this culture being an act of revolution:

When you don’t have self-esteem you will hesitate before you do anything in your life. You will hesitate to go for the job you really wanna go for, you will hesitate to ask for a raise, you will hesitate to call yourself an American, you will hesitate to report a rape, you will hesitate to defend yourself when you are discriminated against because of your race, your sexuality, your size, your gender. You will hesitate to vote, you will hesitate to dream. For us to have self-esteem is truly an act of revolution and our revolution is long overdue.

Word.

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »